this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
