I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
