So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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