I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I have aggressive nipples.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
