Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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