She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
