are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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