i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
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