I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
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