I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
