And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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