This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize
