This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
