it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize