So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
