oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
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