I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
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