You just made me feel so damn special
Define "chronic" masturbator.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
