it was like fucking gandolphs beard
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
