no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize