Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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