dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize