THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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