how can u be prego again
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
