I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
