I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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