He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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