My brain says no but my pants say off.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
