Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
