i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
