So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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