next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize
