i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize