I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
