Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
