My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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