Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
