its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.â€
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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