Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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