whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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