Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
