I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
We have started to decorate penises.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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