It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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