When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Randomize
