Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
