no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize