I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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