He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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