I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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