fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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